As I prepare to test for my E Dan rank, I cannot help but reflect on the past a bit. When I began Tang Soo Do in August 2018, my main goal was to be able to do something fun and healthy with my son, and maybe lose some weight in the process. In the far, distant future was getting my Black Belt. 7 years later, I am preparing for testing for E Dan… My son and I have had so much fun training together over the years and never would I have imagined that we would be doing what we are today.
I tested for Cho Dan in September 2022 (my son tested before that, as he had started well before me in Tang Soo Do). We began to talk about serious goals such as becoming instructors, opening our own dojang, etc.…
However, we were in a car accident (October 2022) that, while we had nothing broken, there were injuries that had to be healed. We missed the rest of 2022. Got back to classes in January 2023. In late February 2023 I sustained a severe concussion that had me out for another couple of months. Those dreams I had with my son were quickly disappearing as I just could not seem to get myself to stay healthy. I was highly frustrated and thought about not even going back to training. My son convinced me to come back, but it was terribly slow going. I did not, and sometimes still do not, have the capacity to remember things like I used to. It has been a struggle preparing for this E Dan test.
We had been tracking our hours for instructing (by the events we attended, etc.) since becoming Cho Dan Bo status, but that was the first thing I made sure we did more seriously when I returned. If I was coming back to classes / training, even with it being a struggle to remember things like I used to, we were still going to work towards achieving our goals. I bought specific journals to log our training for Black Belt camps, tournaments, helping with our local studio testing, etc. We also discussed starting to help with teaching some of the youth classes… At the same time, we began looking into what we needed to do to be certified to help out at tournaments. (I do not typically do anything halfway – it is all or nothing… lol). We would always sign up to help in some way – at that point it was more of setting up, tearing down, etc. We spoke with Master Acri, and he informed us of a judging clinic being held at Saucon Valley in February 2024. We signed up for that and began preparing for the written test. We attended the in – person clinic and did the training. We successfully passed, me as a Corner Judge and Austin as a Score Keeper / Timekeeper. We were so extremely excited for this, as we were finally getting to take the next steps in our future goals for Tang Soo Do. We signed up for our respective areas at the Region 8 tournament in October 2024 at the Kalahari, but unfortunately, they did not select us to help out. Hopefully, we will be picked to help at the next tournament we go to.
Our next step was getting more comfortable with leading / teaching classes. Even for someone like me, who must speak in front of lots of people all the time for my work, it was nerve wracking. I say “was” because I do feel that I have gotten a little more comfortable with it. But I remember thinking the first couple times (and it is still there in the back of my head even now) – what right do I have to teach these people anything? To lead them in warmups, line drills? Who am I to assume that I know more than they do? I suppose the Black Belt around my waist may indicate that I do know a little more about Tang Soo Do than a White or Green belt, but there are other Black Belts in the room as well… they know equal to what I know… What makes me special / able to do this? I would like to say that those questions / doubts have disappeared, but I honestly do not think they ever will, and I actually think that is a good thing. I would never want to get so sure of myself that I think I know what is right all the time and that someone with a lower rank does not. There are plenty of times that I question myself on things and someone else is able to help me – not always someone that is ranked higher than me. So that is definitely something I struggle with, but I do believe it is a good struggle. It keeps me always learning, questioning, and most importantly – it keeps me humble. And as time has passed, I have become more confident in running all aspects of class. For example, last night Austin and I oversaw all three classes at the dojang, as Master Acri was away. We worked on one – steps and self-defense. When planning classes, I try to always make it be something that is curriculum based and something that can still be done in an orderly fashion, so class is not too chaotic… When we first started helping out with classes, I was trying to come up with new ways to do things and I think I put more stress on myself. By keeping with the structured curriculum, it gives us all a base of comfort to fall back on, especially because we are not used to Master Acri being away 😊
Super happy to be able to report that I completed my one hundred hours for Instructor level certification. Master Acri was able to submit that when he renewed for the studio, and I am now fully certified. Also, in November 2024, I completed a MATTAC Level 1 course on instructing, so I am recognized with that as well. I like knowing that I have these certifications backing me up, as that does help to give some confidence when instructing. Another organization recognizes that I have the ability to help others… That is a nice thought to have.
Another thing we have really been discussing / wanting to do is creating / leading our own seminars. I absolutely loved the self defense seminar that I attended last year at Black Belt Clinic with Nikki. It really sparked a desire in me to get more self defense in, at a practical level, to our communities. Even if people are not interested in Martial Arts, they should have a basic understanding of how to protect themselves. I have been talking with Master Acri about starting up a self defense clinic in our area for the community. We have tentatively slated that for this year. Currently trying to find new ways to market it to gather more interest. I would love to be able to see schools also offer something like this to their students, so they are able to protect themselves at a basic level. I would also like to try and restart our Tiny Tiger / Little Dragon program at the dojang. Austin started at age 4, so I have a special place for the really tiny “ninjas” that fall in love with Martial Arts after seeing Power Rangers, Ninjago, or something like that. It can be the start of a lifetime of Martial Arts, as it was for Austin. Now when Austin started, the school he attended did not have a Tiny Tiger / Little Dragon program, so he started right in the GUP program at age 4. That presented challenges for him later on, which he will discuss in his essay, I am sure… but that is why I also think it is so particularly important to have that Tiny Tiger / Little Dragon program active.
Another focus for me, as a student and now as an instructor, is to always help promote and grow the school. We would love to be able to double the size of the school this year and Master Acri is always trying to get more people in. As we live 45 minutes south of the dojang, I feel like I am at a slight disadvantage in trying to get people to join, as most people will not want to drive up like we do. There is not a World Tang Soo Do Association affiliated school in our area anymore, so that is why we made the move to Jae Nam Training Academy back in 2017 with Austin. However, even in our area, when we are offering a deal / coupon, etc., I am passing them out down in our area. But, even more importantly, I am helping to try to find community events that we, as a dojang, can participate in around the dojang to get more people involved from the local area. That would, of course, be ideal. I am hoping that we will be able to find 4 – 5 different festivals that we can participate in this year, as the weather improves, to garner attention for the dojang.
With all of this being said, it has been an incredibly long, hard, but worthwhile journey from Cho Dan to testing for E Dan. I definitely feel like I have increased my responsibilities within the dojang and association, even while recovering from injuries. I am looking forward to being able to help out at tournaments should they decide to put me to use as a corner judge. I am enjoying being able to help teach classes and take some of the pressure off of Master Acri to always have to be there and be running everything. Perhaps he is needing to take care of some paperwork and needs someone to cover class until he can join in. This is why it is so good to have the backups in place, like he now has, to be able to do just that.
As I continue to look to the future and think about what I (well, we, as it’s always been in my plan to have this be something for Austin to continue with as well, even after I can’t) will plan to do, my thoughts remain the same… to continue to work on being more comfortable teaching and learn new ways of doing things to reach all different audiences. I want to be able to be more active within the association with judging and helping out. I do still think that once we get to a 3rd Dan or even 4th Dan, if that can happen, we could open our own dojang. Something that would be down in our area but could still be in conjunction with Jae Nam perhaps to give more representation. It is all things to think about as I continue. But what I am most proud of is that I did not give up. I have continued through all the injuries and problems and kept going. It has taken me longer than I would have liked. I technically, without the injuries, should have been able to test for E Dan September of 2024. And normally, something like that would bother me – not hitting the milestone when I was supposed to. But as it came and went, I found myself more thankful for still being able to train than bothered by the fact that I was not hitting a milestone. I have learned, truly learned, that this is not a race, not a deadline to be reached by (like so much of life is – thinking work deadlines, lol)… but a true journey of your own making that will lead you where you want it to. If you put in the effort to get what you need and want out of it, it will be well worth it, no matter how fast or slow you reach your benchmarks. I look forward to continuing with Tang Soo Do, passing E Dan, training for Sam Dan, continuing to help promote our dojang and style of Martial Arts, and continuing to think and dream about opening our own dojang someday.
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